Announcing “Know and Go”

Know and Go book cover

Coming soon for Kindle only – the story version of First, Know What You Want.

Follow the adventures of Mike Johnson, a harassed middle manager as he works with his coach to work out what he really wants. Use the nine exercises in the book to find your inner compass because before anything else you need to ‘First, Know What You Want’.

Used with the free journal (look right), Know and Go gets straight to the heart of working out what you really want. Ideal to keep on your Kindle.

Out next week. Join the list (look right) and you’ll be the first to know.

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Unless it happens today, it probably won’t…

In the future happen, it won't

A Jedi must have the deepest commitment, the most serious
mind. This one a long time have I watched. All his life has he
looked away… to the future, to the horizon. Never his mind on
where he was. Hmm? What he was doing. Humph. Adventure.
Heh. Excitement. Heh. A Jedi craves not these things.

When you get to that mythical time in the future where you start doing and acting for what you really want, guess what?

Yep, it will be you there. The same you as today. With the same beliefs, behaviours and struggles you have now.

If there is something different you want in the future begin it today. Otherwise you’ll find the future is just like today.

Just saying…

(In my head I carry around a mythical Andrew. He’s great. He’s slim, fit, lithe and eats a healthy diet – mostly natural foods. He’s also well organised, running projects properly and walling off writing time to produce a string of new products.

Problem is, he doesn’t exist. He’s a chimera, a shadow, something I comfort myself with as a fantasy future.

The only way to make him exist is to choose fruit for breakfast today rather than a double sausage and egg McMuffin.

Unless I make these choices now, the future I imagine will never exist.

Same for you.)

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What are you waiting for?

man with laptop staring into space

  • For someone to say sorry?
  • For someone to hold your hand?
  • For someone to show you the way?
  • For someone to give you their blessing?
  • For someone to say they are wrong?
  • For the sun to shine?
  • For a lottery win?
  • For retirement?
  • For the children to leave home?
  • For someone to do it for you?
  • For someone else to make the first move?
  • For someone to give you a good kick?
  • For someone to make it safe for you to jump?
  • For someone else to say they’ll be there in the end?
  • For someone to come back to you?
  • For someone to forgive you?
  • For someone to mend the stepladder?
  • For someone to offer?
  • For someone to notice you?
  • For someone to sweep you off your feet?
  • For a knight in shining armour?
  • For the world to come to its senses?
  • For a diploma?
  • For someone to change his/her mind?
  • For someone to give you the go ahead?

Adapted from original work by Vitae

Order Now: Amazon.co.uk

Order Now: Amazon.com

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Kindle Edition + Free Journal = Winning Combination

Amazon Kindle Logo

Get a copy for your Kindle today

Have you got the Kindle Edition of First, Know What You Want yet?

You can read it on a Kindle or one of the many Kindle Apps that Amazon supply for your computer or mobile device.

It’s a great price and if you download the free journal – look right – you’ll have ample space to make your notes as you figure out what you really want.

Add to Kindle Now: Amazon.co.uk

Add to Kindle Now: Amazon.com

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How to make your dreams come true [extract]

Elephant hide - yummy

Most wishes remain as wishes because they never get connected to any real steps and then never developed into easy, straightforward actions. It’s like that old proverb:

How do you eat an elephant?

If you were given the task of eating an elephant, how would you do it? The main thing you know is you can only do it one mouthful at a time. And before you could get to mouthfuls you’d have to kill it, then saw it into large chunks and divide those chunks into smaller chunks until you had a mouth sized portion. Only then could you begin to eat. Given enough time you could eat the whole thing – one mouthful at a time.

What are your elephants? Your big, unobtainable wishes that are going nowhere?

Why not stop a moment and make a list, before we go any further?

Here are some examples:

  • I’ve always wanted a boat, one the family could use. I’d like to teach my children about boats.
  • I like music and always fancied learning the piano or something else.
  • And New Zealand, there’s a country I’d like to tour, but I cannot see us ever having time for that.

Got your list? Good. This experiment is about having a serious go at connecting these wishes to the steps needed to make them come true.

First you need to sketch out the big steps you’d need to take to turn your wish into reality. Next you need to take each step and break it down into tiny, single step actions (mouthfuls).

What’s a single step action?

A single step action is something like open drawer, turn on television, print document. In other words it’s a small enough action that if I wrote it on a card and gave it to someone they could go and do it.

So far, so good but why think about wishes that don’t stand a chance of coming true?

Grab a pen and draw yourself a cloud shape at the top of the page. Print the word FANTASY inside it. These wishes, (e.g. your desire to own a boat) are fantasies. They float around in your head and you take them out every so often to polish them. Then you consign them to the back of your mind with a wistful look while you get back to reality.

Now draw a circle somewhere else on your page and print the word STEPS inside it. Join it to the cloud with a line. Next draw an arrow down from STEPS and print ACTIONS at the bottom of your paper.

This process is your chance to challenge what you are doing by linking these fantasies to the major steps that would make them real and then breaking down those steps in to a number of easy actions. When you do this I’m willing to bet one of two things will happen.

  1. You will get excited because a fantasy suddenly looks within your grasp.
  2. Or once you appreciate the commitment required to make it happen you will decide it is not for you.

Either way, it will no longer be a fantasy taking up space in your head. Dealing with it either by dismissing it for good or making a real plan will free up space to focus on other things you want.

Next time, we’ll look at a real example, one challenge which always comes up in a workshop at this point - How To Win The Lottery

If this process works like I say it should then it should help you win the lottery, right? To find out how, get your copy of “First, Know What You Want” at Amazon or at half-price for your Kindle..

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How To Tackle The Goal Setting Problem Nobody Talks About | Lateral Action

The Elephant In The Room

How To Tackle The Goal Setting Problem Nobody Talks About | Lateral Action.

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Sound Advice: BBC Essex 24 Jan 2012

See, face for radio...

All the best bits from my Sound Advice slot on BBC Essex 24 Jan 2012. Many thanks to Mark Punter for being a great host. Warning: Contains me…

Intro To First Know What You Want

Who Drives Your Bus?

Three Reasons It’s Hard To Know What You Want

Start Small / Work On What You Don’t Want

Motivation / Kids / Caller

Susan called: “What do you do when the people around you mock your attempts to change?”

How To Make Your Wishes Come True

Does Exercise Help?

Make A Bug List / Come To Your Senses

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The potential to really change lives…

Grateful thanks to a reader who emailed me:

I just finished reading ‘First, Know What You Want’ in Kindle format. I’ve just posted a positive review on Amazon, but I also wanted to say thanks to you directly for writing it, it’s got the potential to really change people’s lives for the better, including my own, and you should be very proud of your work.

Get yours:

Order Now: Amazon.co.uk

Order Now: Amazon.com

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Two Weight Loss Tips For 2012

Article: Braintree Witham Times

Plump coach gives diet tips in local newspaper

Thanks to Braintree & Witham Times who featured my tips for diet success in 2012:

Andrew Halfacre, life coach and author of First Know What You Want, said: Set yourself small goals. The big thing that stops effective slimming is people setting the bar far too high and then getting all disappointed when they don’t hit it.

Once you are getting all your small goals, then you can go after the bigger ones.

Second – set habit goals instead of target goals. A target goal like losing two stone will rarely work. It’s better to set a habit goal like walking for 20 mins a day or drinking a glass of water before every meal.

Weight loss comes from new habits, not setting targets.

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East Anglian Daily Times 14 Jan 2012

East Anglian Daily Times article 14 Jan 2012

Photographer wisely decides to focus on the Polar Bear

You hear a lot about the press and media but Steven Russell at EADT could not have been more helpful and friendly – and he’d actually read the book. Although in the bonkers world that is local newspapers the article is not online so I can’t link to it or push people towards their website. Guess they are still struggling to come to terms with the digital revolution.

Order Now: Amazon.co.uk

Order Now: Amazon.com

UPDATE

Sometimes you get what you want. The feature is now online. Well worth a read.

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